Weekend, plus.
Nov. 9th, 2009 11:00 pm![[personal profile]](https://www.dreamwidth.org/img/silk/identity/user.png){kind=small}
charlz_lynnI had a really great weekend. I'm so FUCKING LUCKY to have such an amazing group of friends, both here and everywhere else. The party was an interesting mix of some of my closest and many people who I don't know that well (and their dates I hadn't met before). It was great to be around all of them. And feel their support. And get belly rubs, and lovely cards, and gifts for Oliver. Sure, I could do this on my own, but I have a feeling I would be so stressed out and much less comfortable. And the material stuff...? Who knows where I would scrape it all together. Even with all this support and love I am incredibly lonely, so I wonder how on Earth I'd cope emotionally without it.
Mara came down and spent the night Friday on her way through town, too, and that was really just great. I wish we lived in the same town. She really feels like my best friend, who I could tell anything at all to, who I can process the really hard stuff with... cry, be raw and sad and miserable and then laughing my ass off minutes later. I find myself wondering if I'll ever come across those qualities in a relationship with a lover again... you know, that family-like closeness. It's hard to imagine right now, for a number of reasons.
The baby is full term today. If I went into labor, it would just be normal procedure. How crazy is that? We're almost there.... that hotel room in Tampa seems so distant, so long ago. Calling Marbles to tell her I had a plus sign on my pee stick. Trying to reach my mom while she was at school. Being on tour in the South with a bunch of people I didn't really know. Driving across the country to live in Seattle and settle down with someone. Deciding not to do that. Driving across the country with Dawn in a car with no muffler for a really great party. More moving. More change. Michigan. More and more and more change.
What a crazy ride, this life.
Mara came down and spent the night Friday on her way through town, too, and that was really just great. I wish we lived in the same town. She really feels like my best friend, who I could tell anything at all to, who I can process the really hard stuff with... cry, be raw and sad and miserable and then laughing my ass off minutes later. I find myself wondering if I'll ever come across those qualities in a relationship with a lover again... you know, that family-like closeness. It's hard to imagine right now, for a number of reasons.
The baby is full term today. If I went into labor, it would just be normal procedure. How crazy is that? We're almost there.... that hotel room in Tampa seems so distant, so long ago. Calling Marbles to tell her I had a plus sign on my pee stick. Trying to reach my mom while she was at school. Being on tour in the South with a bunch of people I didn't really know. Driving across the country to live in Seattle and settle down with someone. Deciding not to do that. Driving across the country with Dawn in a car with no muffler for a really great party. More moving. More change. Michigan. More and more and more change.
What a crazy ride, this life.
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Date: 2009-11-11 12:22 am (UTC)