Carsick

In my dream last night a volcano erupted close to here. So close I was taking pictures of lava from a couple feet away to send to my mom. Casey and I were getting thai food when it happened and then she was gone. Suddenly all these people, including me, were being expected to fight... or something. Like a draft with no training, just expectations. (Though there were no authority figures really around.) Just fatigues and drills and other army-type stuff. People rushing around everywhere. I was trying to hide in a closet with my three favorite boxes/suitcases. My sewing box, my toy suitcase, and another suitcase I've never seen that was beautiful. I hid them by the water heater and tucked myself in a closet that was suddenly very active. People were coming in and saying no way would that work -- other people my age who were supposed to be rallying -- the closet was too busy a place. I told them I'm 7 months pregnant, I can't be doing this shit. I cried. I hid.
I woke up to my phone ringing.

Now I have to go get my proof of pregnancy faxed to DHS (because my body's not proof enough) and then I'm picking up a dresser in SE for twenty bucks. I am so excited to finally move in. I'm still living out of boxes and suitcases and my nest is half-finished. I'm so incredibly unsettled that I want to cry when I talk about it. That's been very hard. I need to get some shelves, too... but it's impossible to spend anything on anything when I have no money at all. I keep getting down to three or four bucks before the next tiny bit of money comes from somewhere like the back pain study. It's unnerving. But at least I have health insurace (or I will as of tomorrow) and food stamps. Thank god. Or... Thank Oregon.