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charlz_lynnso, as many of you know, i am hoping to transfer to Brown university in the fall. my SAT scores will not be in on time with my application, and right now i'm really feeling like i've already dropped the fucking ball. i'm looking at other colleges in providence (because, really, i think i'll get in eventually, and would anything in the world be better than living in caroline and eli's garage?). So, in my search, i found a college, started to apply online, and ended up on the financial aid page where i was told i already missed the deadline for some of the forms. fuck me in the nose. again. i've already, basically, fucked myself. im still going to do my damndest to get in to brown. and i'm still going to try to come up with an "of course i'll get in!" attitude. but seriously. they'll have no test scores to work with, just a gpa from one year of community college.
so, my question to myself is this: do i move there and go to another community college while trying to get in to brown? or do i move there and just wait, and start paying my student loans? i just don't know. i really did drop the damn ball already.
ok. a much lighter note. or at least much happier, tho it may be heavy happiness.
i've been feeling really, truly blessed in my life. i always have in some regards, but recently i've been super mush over a lot of things.
my love, for instance, is a big one. we spent most of sociology today talking about different ways that people find their "ideal mate," and we've been discussing families in general all week. and i can't help but hang out in my head after class, thinking about what our family will look like and how we are going to exist in the world, sharing space, and being a radical family, and just being a family. that word means so much to me, and i never thought that i would share it with anyone who doesn't have the same blood running through their veins, or hasn't parented someone with the same blood. it's intense, and it's really good to have such discussion going on in my life that makes me think about things i've never thought about before, or never had words for, while i'm coexisting in a way with someone that i've never even imagined i would.
also, i got a job. at the cup and saucer, bussing. this is a huge huge blessing, especially when considering the fact that the monday after i got back into town, i dropped off my resume. and then i started working on wednesday. i feel like i'm in shock a little bit. and i'm really happy about it. and really thankful to mjd for hooking me up. it seems a reachable goal that i will be completely, 100%, supporting myself very soon. no unclear lines as far as rent goes. i've waited for this. and not working is just not akay with me.
alright, there are countless other blessings i would like to go into right now. but i do have to get to math class, and eating sounds like a necessity.
so, my question to myself is this: do i move there and go to another community college while trying to get in to brown? or do i move there and just wait, and start paying my student loans? i just don't know. i really did drop the damn ball already.
ok. a much lighter note. or at least much happier, tho it may be heavy happiness.
i've been feeling really, truly blessed in my life. i always have in some regards, but recently i've been super mush over a lot of things.
my love, for instance, is a big one. we spent most of sociology today talking about different ways that people find their "ideal mate," and we've been discussing families in general all week. and i can't help but hang out in my head after class, thinking about what our family will look like and how we are going to exist in the world, sharing space, and being a radical family, and just being a family. that word means so much to me, and i never thought that i would share it with anyone who doesn't have the same blood running through their veins, or hasn't parented someone with the same blood. it's intense, and it's really good to have such discussion going on in my life that makes me think about things i've never thought about before, or never had words for, while i'm coexisting in a way with someone that i've never even imagined i would.
also, i got a job. at the cup and saucer, bussing. this is a huge huge blessing, especially when considering the fact that the monday after i got back into town, i dropped off my resume. and then i started working on wednesday. i feel like i'm in shock a little bit. and i'm really happy about it. and really thankful to mjd for hooking me up. it seems a reachable goal that i will be completely, 100%, supporting myself very soon. no unclear lines as far as rent goes. i've waited for this. and not working is just not akay with me.
alright, there are countless other blessings i would like to go into right now. but i do have to get to math class, and eating sounds like a necessity.
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no subject
Date: 2006-01-17 10:11 pm (UTC)no subject
Date: 2006-01-18 04:16 am (UTC)good luck!
no subject
Date: 2006-01-19 01:01 am (UTC)second...breathe again
now then...you know how institutions of higher learning are....send it in anyway...theres always some sister with a conscience that will help you!!
as for your living arrangements.....hell...id stay in eli and carolines garage!!!!!
carpetti love.....so strong.....bet theyll let you fix some stuff too!!!!
keep your chin up buddy!!!
**bigolhug*