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charlz_lynn I feel sometimes like having this amazing perfect healthy lovely baby erases my right to have no-good shit-hole bummer moods. but it still happens.
Like right now. I feel depressed. Short-term depressed I suppose. I just had some ideas about what tonight was going to be like and then none of that happened. I thought I would go to a movie by myself, no. I thought maybe some sex would happen, no. I thought I would get to sleep next to my girlfriend for the first time in many weeks, no. I thought maybe someone would cuddle me a little bit... be the big spoon.
I definitely need some charlz time.
The other day I was filling out our member card to hang on the wall at our swap and play coop. There's a skills section. I honestly could not think of anything relevant. And then interests. I was standing there forever thinking, Interests? I don't have any interests. Diapers. Milk. Teeth. Cradle cap?
This will not do. I know it's still early, and I am just now getting into a flow where I can leave Oliver with other people (though I'm having issues with pumping) and get out of the house for dinners with friends and things. But for the moment, it's depressing. And magical and wonderful and mind-bogglingly lovely, of course. All the good things are there. It's just... I guess I needed to unload some of the not-so-good things here. Thanks, lj.
Now, I'm going to go put fresh sheets on my bed and snuggle with my bug.
Like right now. I feel depressed. Short-term depressed I suppose. I just had some ideas about what tonight was going to be like and then none of that happened. I thought I would go to a movie by myself, no. I thought maybe some sex would happen, no. I thought I would get to sleep next to my girlfriend for the first time in many weeks, no. I thought maybe someone would cuddle me a little bit... be the big spoon.
I definitely need some charlz time.
The other day I was filling out our member card to hang on the wall at our swap and play coop. There's a skills section. I honestly could not think of anything relevant. And then interests. I was standing there forever thinking, Interests? I don't have any interests. Diapers. Milk. Teeth. Cradle cap?
This will not do. I know it's still early, and I am just now getting into a flow where I can leave Oliver with other people (though I'm having issues with pumping) and get out of the house for dinners with friends and things. But for the moment, it's depressing. And magical and wonderful and mind-bogglingly lovely, of course. All the good things are there. It's just... I guess I needed to unload some of the not-so-good things here. Thanks, lj.
Now, I'm going to go put fresh sheets on my bed and snuggle with my bug.
